" I do not ask the wounded person how he feels; I, myself, become the wounded person"

2004-08-04T11:29:00.000+08:00

Its been a while since i blogged again....well well....i have just began on a new phase of life....back to school after 3 longs years of not studying....my mind feels rusty, laggy, stupid, retarded...n well..to make things worse....im gonna compete with pple from china vietnam n india!?!! ha...who cares...me n my frens all aim to make it to the deans list....so who cares about them man...well...starting on a new phase of life sounds exciting...new friends...maybe lifetime friends...new school...new everything! thought of school kinda excites me but when i think about the studying part....the excitement kinda dies down...

Just yesterday...was talking to my dad...he was pressuring me and asking me to give piano lessons ( yes i can play the piano ), he told me about how good the money was and stuff....n that he had spent alot of money on me to do piano...well...for me....what was going thru my mind was tt...firstly, i think i really appreciate them for putting me through piano...n that i have developed the interest n love for music..but i felt tt i learnt the piano to enjoy music...it wasnt for me to teach others...coz i know the piano...i can now serve God in the music ministry...playing the piano in church...to me thats most important. Secondly, if i dun haf a passion for piano teaching...i shouldnt go into it just for the good money...coz in the end...de one who suffers isnt me...but my student...coz i aint giving my best to him/her. And if i really go into teaching piano...i must be at my best...providing the best for my students....which means i must devote alot of time into the theoretical part of music...which i barely have the time....well i just hope one day he will understand...

Then next was the topic on tuition...coz i give free tuition to some people who really needs help in their studies...sec sch n jc student...my dad says i should charge them money....he says we still need to survive...cannot keep doing charity...but my intention was always...to help someone in need....if they need the help...n i have the resources to help...y not? sigh...will have to think about the charging money part....wad u guys think?

Lastly...yesterday as i was having dinner with a group of new friends...they seem to have a problem seeing me as a teacher...they said i din look like a teacher at all...n said tt rarely guys want to teach...crap what era they from man...den dey went on to sae...huh...u can study hard meh...u got the dun study face....haha...wah lau...relli meh? dey din believe that i can stay back after school to study...well o well...looks like ive got alot to prove this sem...im not gonna care what they sae....teaching is what im called to do since i was young...i love working with students...i see every student as an opportunity for me to share my little part of my life with them...so who care what everyone saes when i know wad i want.....kids hang in there...mr GTJ ( Great Teacher Joel ) is coming....mueahahahhaah

2004-07-22T00:20:00.000+08:00

todays been an eventful day...morning i went MOE building for the 2nd day of my induction programme...was rather interesting today....learnt about how we could equip ourselves better as teachers next time...some books we can read...i felt tt was really helpful....i was allocated to this guy who was giving us a tutorial on mathematics curriculum....he started off by asking us to close our eyes....den he said.....imagine a mountain......den he went on....now on the mountain is a boy running....den he asked us to open our eyes...i was puzzled.....wad was he trying to do?? well...he asked us....when i asked u to imagine a mountain...wad were u thinking of? the words MOUNTAIN or the picture of the mountain?....of course...my ans was the latter....den he proved the pt that our mind is more receptive to images....like our brain remembers images instead of words....hmmmm so true.....

then went on was the tspc...which stands for teaching scholarship presentation ceremony....but this was the rehersal....well...when i went on stage..recieved my file...den went down stage...there was a pool of moe personnel there...they went...his hair his hair his hair...gosh....dey den told me my hair had to go down....u see i gel my hair...spiked up...abit of mohawk in the middle...but i tot it was already very mild....damn....now i dunno how to comb my hair on the actual day.... bad bad relli bad...

den went on to the part where they chose pple to entertain the VIPs on tt day....dey were telling us some of us were gonna be selected to entertain the VIPs during the tea reception on that day....well well...guess wad.....i wun be typing this if nothing happened......haha... i WAS ONE OF THE SWAY ONES TO KENA!..... 30 / 140 ? tok about the probability....kena 4D aso not so heng....i was assigned to entertain Dr Ng Eng Hean....Minister of Home Affairs i think....gosh.... gotta think of some intellectual qns to ask him....

Anw...today was kinda fun...knew a few new friends...so was good....den went to church in the night for my bintan meeting...was a very very constructvie meeting and i really felt we r moving forward...really like to praise God....

Well...to round off the day... i guess for the past few days...if theres anything ive learnt...its about humility....being someone who is always on the forefront...full of ideas...n perhaps someone who is very vocal ....its important to be humble...n thank God for all these talents...for I could do all these not for my own strength...but its God who granted me all these....so everytime when u feel so accomplished...STOP.....its not about You...its about what God allowed u to do...so its always good to keep yourself in check....yupyup!

Thought of the day: Never ever think it will never happen to you...the more u think u wun kena...the more u will!

2004-07-20T18:05:00.000+08:00

realised i haven really blogged for a month....well....today i went thru the moe induction programme....got me really excited to be a teacher....i cant wait to go into a classroom full of students to teach...but well...my time is not here yet....i still have to go thru uni....well...uni is gonna be a new phase of life...hopefully ill cope just fine...anw....life for the past month for me...i guess been full of bb, church bintan team, moe programmes, meeting up with friends and well...preparing for uni..went to luanas sch dance concert last wk....it was really a great concert and i enjoyed it...well...saw some ol frens....all of them with their boyfriends....well...wanted to meet up with them...but well i guess it just wasnt appropriate....things arent the same....again....

welll....past few days ive been trying real hard....to make some things work out...but i guess....its useless....my best friends...closest buddies....dey are all slipping away.... =( feel rather disillusioned.....dey are all slipping and fading away...sigh

2004-06-17T11:20:00.000+08:00

well...mon tue and wed was my chalet with my friends....it was reaalll realll fun...one of the best chalets i ever been too....well...we met on mon morning...where me bobo benlow and jereme had a adventure meeting first before we proceeded to sentosa...haha..made a fool of ourselves at harbour front cold storage while getting some tidbitss...ha...den ate lunch at mac and den we went to the chalet...upon touchdown to the chalet...we proceeded to the beach and played volleyball...well...wasnt the greatest of games coz all of them were new to the game....anw...we took pics...some crazy ones too...haha..after that was the BBQ!!!! i LOVE BBQs....me and weijie had a hard time starting the fire coz of the stupid wind...keep on extinguishing our fire...anw...about 45 mins later...fire was up and it was a gd fire...(as usual) haha..we proceeded with the bbq...as usual i was the cook and they were all playing heart attack and stuff....of course...huihua helped out...followed by jia en and angeline...at first it looked like there was not enuff for everyone...but in the end...there was too much food! haha...well...so we put all the food in the centre of the table...sat around the table...and played games...firstly, indian poker...loser eat...haha...ben low kana the most...welll he needed the food aniwae..haha..den we played who what huh...haha...we tortured benedict and angeline...haa...den followed by 007...lotsa stupid games...make me luff till stomachache... den came this time where we all became crazy..doing stupid stunts jumping into the pool...i jumped and dived till de food almost came out of my stomach...haa...went crazy...did the 'banana' too...dunno wad isit? will show u the video if u wanna see...haha...well oh well...den at nite went back to chalet to catch the euro 2004 fever on TV3...THANK U MALAYSIA...hahaha...den slpp.....

next morning...i woke up at 10am...hh went home the nite b4...so sad....den jereme went off to settle his poly stuff...weijie went home to study...bobo went home to take his camera charger...i went to the beach to do some reading.....after that we went to delifrance for brunch...wow...8 bucks...expensive siah...well went back to chalet after tt...played snap...where angeline went crazy...haa...her fav game...but we kept winning...so we only stopped playing tt game after angeline won...den bobo came back with monopoly...we played it and...ben low only got 2 properties !!! coz he kept on landing on other peeps properties...haha..so funny....after a while he dun wan play aredi...ahahah....anw...after tt we went to the beach a while...den went to swimming pool to tan and swim...after which we went to the musical fountain...it was real nice...they finally changed the show...its different...nicer...with fireballs...i wanna go and see again...its quite cool...din noe spore was capable of such stuff...anw...so after dinner we went back to chalet..b4 that we went to palawan beach 7-11 to get peanuts and drinks for our euro fever...so went back...caught the first game where czech played with latvia...after tt game...we played blind mice! hahah switched off all the lights and it was pitch dark...couldnt see anithing....bobo was teh first catcher...followed by jia en...den ben low...who was teh longest...ahha...he got a beating from us...first time....we all went out of the room...den he was left alone inside...hahah....but then the 2nd time...jereme and bobo hid in the cupboard...leaving me jia en and angeline running around...well...i gave ben a hard time....threw mattresses pillows and blankets at him....haha...got cuts and bruises in the process....well but it was fun...so heck the injuries...haha...in the end...after all the runing..i was tired..so i went one corner and squat down and rest....and ben caught me....haha...but den...the next match started...so we stopped the game....well germany vs holland...was damn exciting...germany is real gd man...dunno who will win the tournamnet though....welll after the match all went to slp...

next morning we woke up...checked out...went harbour front for lunch...den we all went home to slp....tts all about it...took many crazy fotos during the chalet...haha check it out if u guys can...sign off now

2004-06-13T00:15:00.000+08:00

well oh well...the trueeee meaning of love...was inspired by a show yesterday...on the real meaning of love...ill let u guys judge...u noe..to me...to love a person does not mean that i will possess her or be together with her....in fact...it means that as long as she is happy...ill be happy...that is love...and dats regardless on whether she is happy with another person....yehh...basically ill outline the main story...

Lets call this guy Jong and the gurl Kuoki...and prince charming Jai...well...Jong is in love with Kuoki...and they are good friends...but Kuoki just treats him like a friend...Jong was always there to cheer Kuoki up whenever she is down...one day...she got together with Jai...and they spent the night having sex...well u see...Jai was a playboy who was very rich...so for the next few weeks...Kuoki and Jai was together....spent all their time together....well...Jong was just at the side...though in his heart he is sad coz he sees the person he loves with another guy....but still...he feels happy for her coz he sees her so happy...

All was fine between Kuoki and Jai till one day Kuoki found out that she was pregnant...She told Jai...and Jai was worried and he asked her to abort the baby....on her bday eve...she asked him if he was gonna be free on the next day...he gave her his credit card and told her to go settle it herself...well....being heartbroken....she spent the whole day out walking around herself... Well... side track abit..lets tok about wad has Jong been doing...well...Jong...knowing that Kuoki bday was coming...was looking for a present...he knew she liked this ring alot coz when they went out together...she kept looking at the ring...this ring costs 1000 bucks and Jong was poor...so he worked really really hard and did all kinds of thing sjust to earn tt money...and he went on to buy the ring...well so back to Kuoki...she was on her way back home...and when she opened her door, there was Jong and her friends giving her a surprise bday celebration...Jong being a joker and always playful...smashed the cake in her face and kept luffing at her...not noeing wad she was going thru...as he was luffing he took out the ring and presented it to her....only to get slapped real hard...anw...that was sad.... then he went home sad...

Next Morning, Jong recieved a call from Kuoki...she asked him to accompany her to the abortion centre...well to cut the long story short...she went thru the abortion and the after effect was very bad...she was in pain on the hospital bed after the op...well...Jong was beside her...and as she was sleeping....he could see her in pain...and he just cried and cried...coz he saw her suffering...well after a few hours...she discharged and he booked a hotel for her to rest and recuperate...coz her mum did not noe about it...so wad happen was Jong...begged the jewellery shop to buy back the ring coz he needed the money badly....only after he kept on begging them and begging them...den they gave him the money...using the money he paid for the hotel...bought food to cook for Kuoki....he spent the next few days...taking care of her...cooking for her...and specially made her cheer up thru his performances...there was one scene which was very touching....As Kuoki was sitting up resting on the bed...Jong took out warm towel just to sponge her face and hands...necks...he did it for her...telling her that his mum said it was important to keep ur body warm after abortion...if not when u grow old next time u will have problems...as he was cleaning her...she looked at him and cried....coz she was so touched....

After one week they went back home...well...it was the inter sch competition...and Jong happened to be in the Karate competition while Kuoki was a dancer...those coyotee ugly type...well..as u noe...Kuoki wasnt supposed to participate in the dance coz she just finished her operation...so when Jong was performing his karate stunt...it was the stunt where u place concrete on ur stomach and they use this big hammer to hit to smash it...well on the last slab...Jong saw Kuoki walking into the hall preparing for her dance...he was so worried that he sat up...and not paying attention to the hammer coming down on him...the hammer hit his head....he straightaway went unconscious.... So he was carried out of the stage...next scene was the gurl performing her dance.,...as she was performing her dance halfway...Jong came out and wanted to watch over her...watch her dance...just to make sure she is ok...but he was restrained by alot of pple coz he had to see the doctor...so there was this struggle and commotion as he was held back but he kept crying and shouted he wanted to see her dance....Kuoki cried as she was dancing...

WEll...things din go on fine after the dance...Jong went to find Kuoki...only to find her bleeding profusely...immediately he carried her to the hospital...crying and shouting for someone to help him....welll she was warded...parents informed...her mum went into the ward...to beat up the daughter coz she was very distraught...Jong stopped her...and was beaten up by the mum..coz the mum tot he did that to her....well he just stood there to let her beat....well...following that...Jong went to find Jai and beat him up...and made him go to the hospital...den he left Jai mum and Kuoki in the room an d left the room....crying....

So guess wads the ending? Nice guys finish last....welll thats the saying nowadays...well...haha...in the end...JONG AND KUOKI ended up TOGETHER!!!....so nice...haa...well...thats the true meaning of love people...giving sacrifices for someone u love...not controlling her...always being there for her....and yet being happy as long as she is happy...even though she is with another guy...tts the true meaning of love.... Any OBJECTIONS?

2004-06-06T02:02:00.000+08:00

well...its been a great day today...woke up in the morning...as promised...did housework for my family...after that went to sch...den went to indoor stadium with meilin dingling junxiang sirong and joel loke...well...siqiang was supposed to join us but he last min got recalled by his parents to help out in the coffeeshop...so sad....anw...had a really great time in worship again at Festival of Praise...well...ive got only one thing to say...The Lord we worship...IS ALMIGHTY and we should really love Him with all our hearts our minds and surrender our lives for Him...its so great to see so many youths today surrendering their lives to Him....i really pray for those youths who committed themselves today....After FOP, me ding meilin jx and sirong went to find siqiang at his coffeeshop to go find him....hanged around and just chatted till 1am...den we all proceeded back to our homes....
Right now...well...feeling kinda sad i guess....coz im thinking of a plight my friend is in...this friend of mine is suffering what she does not deserve at all...i can only stand by the side and see her suffer and yet cant do anyting to help her at all...i really wish sometimes i could cheer her up...or just make her suffering any lesser...well...theres a limit to how i can help...feeling lousy over the limit i can help...well........i guess i just gotta keep praying for her and just stay by her...hoping one day...she will get the love she soooo deserves....take care my dearest friend....

2004-06-05T00:57:00.000+08:00

Today i had my driving lesson after a long long time...feels rusty but i guess my confidence is already there....haha...after all...i failed once aredi....anw....todae went to Festival of Praise....before that i was reading a Christian Book named ' Purpose Driven Life ' in the MRT...well...learned something real important which i insist on sharing.... Here it goes:
Well...First thing is about love....have u ever felt that u have irritating friends around u? Unlovable friends? People whom u will feel turned off whenever they appear in front of u?....Well...God has purposely put the unlovable and irritating people with u...so that u can learn how to really love your neighbour as yourself....after all that is one of the greatest commandment....so guys think about it...the next time u see such people around...might wanna change your approach....
Secondly...its on forgiveness....well....the book said...u could choose either of the Rs....when someone does something wrong to you....it will be either Retaliation or Resolution....u can retaliate when someone does something wrong to u...and end up in a quarrel...but wad will be the end result? both parties getting hurt...and regretting wad each other did.....HOWEVER...if it was Resolution...things would be much better....when someone does something wrong to u....think about Resolving it...firstly by forgiving him/her simply because no one is perfect...and God First forgave us and even died for our sins....well the least we could do...is do the same....so the next time...someone pisses u off real bad...choose Resolution not Retaliation...choose to forgive and resolve conflicts...u never noe how much that person will appreciate it...think bout it...

Anw...went to Festival of Praise today...it was led by hillsongs....i had a really really great and refreshing time praising and worshipping the Lord....after that me huihua jia en ziyi and ben low had a fun photo taking session among ourselves...haha.....anw....will go tml again...u guys should go too...anw...its bed time...im gonna wake up early and do house work tml...something new i must learn how to do...coz i want to help my parents...the least i can do to show my appreciation...well...nights my frens....and before i forget....HAPPY BDAY GIRL GIRL....haha...whoever dunno her...tooo bad...i love her...hehe..enjoy ur bday girl

2004-05-31T21:51:00.000+08:00

friends friends friends....i thank God for all my friends...i thank God for this group of caring and thoughtful friends...i love u all guys...anw, this morning i went to see the doc...after doing some stretching of my leg...he told me that i had a muscle tear in my hamstring...and i need to rest about 2-3 weeks...but he only gave me 1 day mc! haha crazy guy...anw, doesnt relli affect me since im clearing leave now... after seeing the doc, i accompanied my dad for shopping of groceries in ntuc...he taught me how to choose apples and oranges..haha...next time can buy for my family when i get married...but that will be a long long time...haha...wun be thinking of getting attached at the moment... after the shopping, my frens came...

jereme, ben low, reuben, jia en, ziyi and huihua came my house to visit me...it was so nice of them to do so...knowing that i was bored to death at home....really appreciate u all guys...ben low was thoughtful...asked me whether i wanted a ice cream cone from mac b4 he came..jereme...brought his ps2 and lent me his set so that i will not be bored! and reuben...he brought me a stack of VCDs so that i could watch it and kill time...really appreciate all of u guys...I LOVE U ALL!!!!! had a fun time in the afternoon aniwae...the never ending last man standing smack down, and the winning eleven matches...haha...thanks dudes....

After dey left, another group of friends came...my bs group had bs at my house this time coz i had restriccted movement...really appreciate it lots too guys....after bs we went to the coffeeshop below my house to have dinner...and now im back blogging...i just had a gd dae today....clearing leave now...haha...feels like school holiday all over again....see ya guys..

2004-05-30T11:36:00.000+08:00

hey people...guess wad..im blogging again...u will see it very often nowadays...coz if u read yest blog..u noe wad happened to me...and im home bound...so bored...whole day at home...alone....im gonna be lonely to death man...sighs...anw...i love this song .... nice tune and nice lyrics...

Fresh Feeling
by Eels

You don't have a clue,
what it is like
to be next to you.

I'm here to tell you,
that it is good,
that it is true.

Birds singing a song,
old paint is peeling,
this is that fresh
that fresh feeling.
Words can't be that strong,
my heart is reelin',
this is that fresh,
that fresh feeling.

Try, try to forget,
what's in the past,
tomorrow is here.

Love, orange sky above,
lighting your way
there's nothing to fear.

Birds singing a song,
old paint is peeling,
this is that fresh
that fresh feeling.
Words can't be that strong,
my heart is reelin' and,
this is that fresh,
that fresh feeling.

Some people are good,
babe in the hood,
so pure and so free.

I make a safe bet,
you're gonna get,
whatever you need.

Birds singing a song,
old paint is peeling,
this is that fresh
that fresh feeling.
Words can't be that strong,
my heart is reeelin',
this is that fresh,
that fresh feeling.

That fresh feeling.
This is that fresh feeling.

i love this song...it kinda depicts how im feeling now...i dunno...yups...haha...will blog soon.

2004-05-29T21:31:00.000+08:00

sighs...finally im blogging....well...on a bad note...guess wad happened...i PULLED MY HAMSTRING...now im on my chair in pain...sigh...gonna be so restricted...no sports...no outdoor...jus stay at home and rest...i hate this feeling...esp when im clearing leave in the army now...it SUCKS! anw...today was great...met my fren for breakfast todae...had a gd one! hehe...thanks...den went sch.... played carrom...trashed weiming..haha...rare occasion...den trashed chan ho in basketball..lol...lax dude..den followed by the soccer match against 26th coy...will not tok much about it just that it took us a relli long time before the match started....well...anw...the match started and i was playing my favourite new found position....Centre Midfield...i felt i had a great game considering that we faced a tough opponent...but well...as the match went on, before half time, i was chasing a ball real hard...coz i was through on goal...only to hear my hamstring snap and me tumbling to the ground....i was in total agony...both emotionally and physically...i hate getting injured...it meant rest which i din relli like....i LOVE SPORTS...sighs...anw...33rd won the game 4-0...was a great match...well...then sheow en was nice enough to walk me to my door coz i had difficulty with stairs...thanks bro...relli appreciate a lot...

anw...im gonna come out with a notion today...why do people like to stereotype things...nowadays...u see 1 gurl and 1 guy go out together...it means they are together...or they are dating....well experienced this before? u go out with ur gd fren...well she happens to be of a different sex from u...but well..u both are gd frens...and relli jus simple plain gd frens and nothing much...and people jus accuses u on being together...or u dating...i mean...cant a guy and a gurl go out as frens...and be real gd frens...WHY cant tt happen? sighs... anione experienced this before? well...i just feel its perfectly normal and ok for a guy and a gurl to be gd frens and yet not be together dating...well think bout it....ill leave the thought here...ciaoz

-Pulled hamstring-

2004-05-07T20:17:00.000+08:00

well...today marks the end of the course im conducting...the 7th Advanced Section Leaders Course....its been a day of mixed emotions...this is a batch of trainees i gladly say that they are the best...they try hard...they play hard...everything is just worth being proud of...it was also officially the last course im gonna conduct in my NS life....i feel proud and honoured to be able to train this batch of trainees...to see them CPLs from day 1 till 10 wks later....now SGTs....well...the change was distinct...im really proud of them...happy to see them grow....im also relieved that finally the tough and busy phase for me is over...its finally time to let our hair down and enjoy....and my branch sure know how to let our hair down...they are right now in a chalet at sentosa...haha...while im in camp doing DUTY!! will join them tml morning though...thats wad i call....work hard and PLAY HARD....well...back to the course....however...its saddening to see the trainees leaving...the fun we had altogether...the shit...all the times...im starting to reminisce.....these are a great bunch of guys whom i really feel very attached to...well...it also meant that my understudies are coming to take over me soon...well well well...another changing phase of life...i have no idea why im feeling sad...coz a normal person would feel so damn happy...haa....well....7th ASLC...u guys rock...hope to keep in contact with u all....ill never forget this course....its been so rewarding....take care folks

2004-05-05T00:10:00.000+08:00

hey friends...jus blogging now to bring up a notion....the notion is my msn nick for the past week...it is:get REAL!...being mr nice guy wun get u anione! gurls love bad image guys! those who agree pls stand uP! iM dAmn RIte....well well...have been toking to alot of pple about it...ive recieved many many pple's msgs on wad they think about this topic....both guys and gurls....well....the conclusion im gonna come up with.....after all the discussions...YES IT IS TRUE....its not my biased pt of view but its from all the discussions....well right now if u r still wondering wad the notion is....well its about the trend nowadays...gurls no longer go after mr nice guy...its no longer their dream date or something liddat...they wan guys who are bad...mean....coz they think its cool...someone did tell me...its more exciting...not boring...she would rather get hurt by tt guy....but at least it was fun....someone else said...its even more cool to see someone mean show concern for u...like a mean guy shows care for u...its sooo nicee....basically gurls jus wanna haf fun....nice guys nowadays are BORING....and well....after a while in a relationship...the girls will tell them that there is no more feeling....he deserves someone better....well...its all jus PACK OF LIES....the fact is...nice guys jus aint the ones gurls wan.....dun get it wrong my friends...im jus coming up with this notion after observing the trend...i definitely am not desperate now...nor i was jus rejected by a gurl...no of such things...haha...its jus a trend i wish to bring it up...and well....jus as i was to blog this todae....my fren yiping...directed me to one of her friends site...and well...i think u guys should jus take a look at it...im gonna cut and paste....its very long...but its worth reading...TRUST ME ON THIS! it goes like thiss.....

While I ranted about how generic the word Nice has become, here's a little something for the Mr Nice Guys out there, it does ring true in many senses... (think this was what you wanted to send me, Sheena?)

Jason, this is why you should remain Version 1.0 and not change to V2.0 Jerkosaurus

This is a tribute to the nice guys. The nice guys that finish last, that never become more than friends, that endure hours of whining and bitching about what assholes guys are, while disproving the very point. This is dedicated to those guys who always provide a shoulder to lean on but restrain themselves to tentative hugs, those guys who hold open doors and give reassuring pats on the back and sit patiently outside the changing room at department stores. This is in honor of the guys that obligingly reiterate how cute/beautiful/smart/funny/sexy their female friends are at the appropriate moment, because they know most girls need that litany of support. This is in honor of the guys with open minds, with laid-back attitudes, with honest concern. This is in honor of the guys who respect a girl’s every facet, from her privacy to her theology to her clothing style.

This is for the guys who escort their drunk, bewildered female friends back from parties and never take advantage once they’re at her door, for the guys who accompany girls to bars as buffers against the rest of the creepy male population, for the guys who know a girl is fishing for compliments but give them out anyway, for the guys who always play by the rules in a game where the rules favor cheaters, for the guys who are accredited as boyfriend material but somehow don’t end up being boyfriends, for all the nice guys who are overlooked, underestimated, and unappreciated, for all the nice guys who are manipulated, misled, and unjustly abandoned, this is for you.

This is for that time she left 40 urgent messages on your cell phone, and when you called her back, she spent three hours painstakingly dissecting two sentences her boyfriend said to her over dinner. And even though you thought her boyfriend was a chump and a jerk, you assured her that it was all ok and she shouldn’t worry about it. This is for that time she interrupted the best killing spree you’d ever orchestrated in GTA3 to rant about a rumor that romantically linked her and the guy she thinks is the most repulsive person in the world. And even though you thought it was immature and you had nothing against the guy, you paused the game for two hours and helped her concoct a counter-rumor to spread around the floor.

This is also for that time she didn’t have a date, so after numerous vows that there was nothing “serious” between the two of you, she dragged you to a party where you knew nobody, the beer was awful, and she flirted shamelessly with you, justifying each fit of reckless teasing by announcing to everyone: “oh, but we’re just friends!” And even though you were invited purely as a symbolic warm body for her ego, you went anyways. Because you’re nice like that.

The nice guys don’t often get credit where credit is due. And perhaps more disturbing, the nice guys don’t seem to get laid as often as they should. And I wish I could logically explain this trend, but I can’t. From what I have observed on campus and what I have learned from talking to friends at other schools and in the workplace, the only conclusion I can form is that many girls are just illogical, manipulative bitches. Many of them claim they just want to date a nice guy, but when presented with such a specimen, they say irrational, confusing things such as “oh, he’s too nice to date” or “he would be a good boyfriend but he’s not for me” or “he already puts up with so much from me, I couldn’t possibly ask him out!” or the most frustrating of all: “no, it would ruin our friendship.” Yet, they continue to lament the lack of datable men in the world, and they expect their too-nice-to-date male friends to sympathize and apologize for the men that are jerks.

Sorry, guys, girls like that are beyond my ability to fathom. I can’t figure out why the connection breaks down between what they say (I want a nice guy!) and what they do (I’m going to sleep with this complete ass now!). But one thing I can do, is say that the nice-guy-finishes-last phenomenon doesn’t last forever. There are definitely many girls who grow out of that train of thought and realize they should be dating the nice guys, not taking them for granted. The tricky part is finding those girls, and even trickier, finding the ones that are single.

So, until those girls are found, I propose a toast to all the nice guys. You know who you are, and I know you’re sick of hearing yourself described as ubiquitously nice. But the truth of the matter is, the world needs your patience in the department store, your holding open of doors, your party escorting services, your propensity to be a sucker for a pretty smile. For all the crazy, inane, absurd things you tolerate, for all the situations where you are the faceless, nameless hero, my accolades, my acknowledgement, and my gratitude go out to you. You do have credibility in this society, and your well deserved vindication is coming.

Fu-zu Jen, SEAS/WH, 2003

I know plenty of gals who like the Bad Boy, the one with the arrogant side or a mean streak or just plain makes them cry sometimes. Bad boys have layers and fascinate with their complex natures, something some women find absolutely intriguing and attractive. They'll put up with the shit and pain these guys put them through, perhaps thinking that they could be The One to change the Bad Boy into the Good Guy. Or maybe they're justmasochistic that way.

I honestly think that while they want to go out with the bad boy now, they'll end up wanting to marry the nice guys in the end. They might be 'boring', not as difficult to figure as Bad Boys but they're steady, and that's what women want to end up with: Security.

But as Jason lamented, "I don't want to wait until that age for girls to be interested in me!" and sometimes I'm afraid that will happen to me~

The Bad Boys may get the girlies now, but there'll always be those who know better, and head straight for the Nice Guys while they're still available. So when we end up bitching that all the Nice Guys are either gay or taken, maybe we should remember that we passed up on that opportunity when we had it.

yeahhh thats about it....well...the rest is up to u guys...do lemme noe ur comments about this...i relli think its so damn true...haha...

2004-04-30T20:18:00.000+08:00

gonna blog for the past 2 days....well..yest has been a celebration in camp.. in the afternoon there was an inter course soccer tournament....where our 3SG course was against the Men course....well...the last game was a course vs instructors match...haa...had really alot of fun...the instructors won 4-0 i think....was playing centre midfield once again....im really starting to love tt position in field soccer....haha....im starting to get the soccer fever...though both my legs are swollen coz it is full of tackle wounds...haha...but I LOVE THE GAME....anw....after the match was a makan session plus an entertainment night....had a really great time drinking and watching the performances by the trainees...they were real creative...imitating my colleague...haha...luffed till i had stomachache...and they composed song and stuff...was really impressed by them....drank alot with my trainees too...was really in a celebration mood coz my army term is finally coming to an end very sooon...will really miss thsoe times....anw...once the session finished, went back to my bunk and slept..........till

this morning.....woke up and went for IPPT....was there so i could pace my training officers as well as my colleauge...well...they did not do very well due to the lack of training i guess...but i still felt really good running...im beginning to love running too!! haha....guess im gonna spend the next few mths jus playing soccer and running....so i CAN LOSE WEIGHT.....im hell heavy...time for me to lose some weight man....anw...after that went to spend some time with my trainees where they did an instructor appraisal today....generally the feedback from me is...FIRM STRICT JOKER SGT...haha...well i love tt...some say im a Physical training fanatic....some thanked me for helping them in their fitness....well...generally happy with the feedback...guess im born to be an instructor....haha.....WAHHAHAHA....*evil luff*...anw....right now...im sitting in my office,...known as ops rm....blogging...coz THERE IS NO ONE AROUND,....ITS SO DARN BORING...i cant wait to leave camp.....See ya guys!

2004-04-28T21:51:00.000+08:00

will be bloggin for the past few days...been tooo tired...yest i was on off coz i had to go to NUS for a medical check up...NUS just wants our $25...coz i believe the cost of the check up itself wasnt valid at all, jus a urine test, eye check and X ray...and it cost so much? gosh....waste of money...anw...met up with a friend who have already left the army, he brought me and weifeng around NUS and we went on a tour...haha...basically its quite exciting to start Uni...cant wait to do tt....after that went to look at fones at west mall...wahh...im super gian to get T630...its so nice and cooooool....haha...will try to get my hands on those sooon...anw, after that i went home pack my room and had a gddd slpp...nothing much....

today went to camp, nothing much really, did some admin work and prepared documents for my understudy to take over...the highlight of the day is de soccer i guess...haha...instructors won 5-3 for the first game...but lost 1-0 the next...i was playing central midfield throughout,....im really starting to like this position....haha...will try to develop on it...anw...some trainee zham me on my left calf...now its swollen...darn....tml is gonna be their function...will have dinner and soccer...hoep if will be fun!! see ya soon guys!

2004-04-25T23:28:00.000+08:00

will be blogging for both sat and sun....sat was a rather moderate day...i would sae a day where i felt nolstalgic...morning as usual i slaved for my unit by conducting yet another range for the pilots....after which i went to NUH to see 2 of my trainees....my poor trainees....1 had bladder infection and the other had dislocated knee....well...i showed my care and concern to the maximum...i stayed with them for a few hours....bought lunch for the dislocated knee guy with my own money.....bought magazines and new paper for the guy warded with bladder infection....i also lent him my radio reciever so he wouldnt be soo bored....well...thats the least i can do as an instructor i guess...felt real sad to see them in hospital...sighs...hope they are having a good rest now though....anw....in the afternoon was mr wee's photo shoot for his big day....it was like a school affair...haha...see all the ex bb boys all returning for the photo shoot...as for me...i reunited with my best ever basketball team...we all wore our jerseys and had a great time catchin up and playing basketball together...really brings back loads of memories....haa....after the gathering, i played soccer with my bb boys, where then reuben got quite badly injured with a wound on his shoulder....den had dinner at dover where mr wee treated all of us.... 4 tables!!!! thanks mr wee anw...after which me bobo jia en ziyi and jereme went to buy ice cream and sat in the playground at dover jus talking...haha...while waiting for bobo's mum.....den when bobo's mum came...she waved at me...haha...din noe wad she was tryin to do coz when she waved...it looked as though she asked me to go over...haha...unsure of wad to do...i jus waved back...haha...den she stopped waving...i was right...she was just tryin to say hi...haha....anw...spent the night at jia en's house watchin the worst match ever....man u vs liverpool where man u played like shit...esp gary neville who gave away an unnecessary penalty...sighs.....after that....me, jereme and jia en shared his queen size bed...shant include any details of wad happened...lol...thats basically for sat....

Sun .... i woke up at 830...and used the bolster to whack jia en and jereme up...haha....for a very long time...jia en and jereme was in church before service started...haha...anw....after service went queensway...walked around...den anchorpt den ikea....where i jotted down lots of stuff to buy...haha...gonna buy them soon....carpet.... and cushions and display cupboard....anw....while on my way home...i was walking on the grass wiating for a cab when i saw a pile of shit...so i tried to avoid it by stepping down to the road....the road was uneven and my leg landed akwardly...resulting me falling on the road...DAMN....heng no car on the road...or else there will be no more blog todae....lol....thank God...aniwae...i heard crack sound on my ankle and now it feels very wierd....sighs....damn sway siah....aniwae...thats all about todae....

2004-04-23T21:12:00.000+08:00

hi pple...betcha all wondering how come its been soo many days since i blogged...thats because i just go back from the jungle today!! I just finished a 5 day 4 nights outfield digging exercise...haa...trenches and command posts and concentina wires and enemies....and lightnings and rain...and flood...basically its all in the package...Body feels sore after this exericse...basically i havent been sleeping ever since monday and im still right here blogging...crazy right? haha...i really hope this is my last OUTFIELD EXERCISE IN THE JUNGLE....coz im gonna ORD sooon!!!!...haha...well...had a great time with my trainees the past few days and also my fellow collegaue instructors....they are a great bunch to be with and we had such a great time...jsut talking cock ....joking....haha... and of course riddling....which makes me wanna post this riddle now...for u guys to think...once u think u got the ans...lemme noe...if u can get the ans...ill treat u to a meal...confirm!
here it goes:
There is 2 guys...A and B....A is on island A ....and B is on island B....right now..A has got a treasure chest inside full of treasure....And he wants to transport the chest to B on Island B...the only source of transport A can use is the pirate ship...however...A cannot board the pirate ship because he would get killed by the pirates....The treasure chest must be locked everytime its on the pirate ship..so that the pirates will not steal the treausre.....what both A and B has is 1 lock each...and of course the key to the lock...A's key can only open A's lock and B's key can only open B's lock...well using all this info....THINK CAREFULLY...how can A actually transport the treausre cand give it all to B?? haha......bet no one can find the ans...

anw...well well welll....todae i left camp at 530pm...my incik drove me home...that was really nice of him...den i went to westmall to meet jia en coz its been a while since we met up...ha...went to find medeline to say hi...and bought her dinner after her having SOOO MANY REQUESTS.....haha..jk gurl...den jia en came my house and we talked...and he used my internet...ha...basically i think right now any moment ill drop dead on my bed...coz im dead tired...and my whole body is itching...arghhhh....well...having mixed feelings now.....love...sighs.....im generally gettinh more and more negative towards this 4 letter word...it causes hurt...trouble...doubtfulness...insecurity....oversensetivity....full of worry...regretfulness....and more hurt....these are basically wad i gathered from the past few weeks as my friends related with me with all their problems....well...thats just how i feel perhaps...but...its true....coz im a victim of one too...but well...life goes on...and i haf gotten over it already..i just wanna sae one thing to everyone....here it goes:
If you love him/her ....and he/her loves u....cherish each other...give it a try........but if you love him/her and he/her treats u like shit...and more shit....u should try to let tt feeling fade away and forget about him/her...for he/she will only hurt and hurt and hurt u.......tts basically my 2 cents worth...im dead tired...i miss all my friends after so lonngg in the jungle....see ya all soon!

2004-04-18T21:43:00.000+08:00

ok...since xiang saes i sae too many well...todae ill be particular and cut down on it...haha...well (1st)....started of the day by getting to church on time....after which went for lunch at dover...haa...todae PHUWIN was back! my sec 2 classmate...from thailand...he came back to visit us...haha...he has changed...no more milk bottle spectacles...wearing contacts...had a shock recognising him...haha...anw dude great seeing u again...well(2nd)...todae jereme and jia en din go church...so din ziyi....only me reuben and ben low and sq and derrick was there....so after church....ben low din haf money to go watch movie...so left me and reuben...haha...we had a romantic afternoon...jus me and him...went to tiong bahru...den great world...walked around and watched starksky and hutch...oh ya...ziyi joined us at the last part coz someone stood him up...haha...yeah...starksky and hutch was damn funny...haha...the famous line...by ben stiller...' DO IT....NOW DO IT' haha...funny funny funny....during the movie shared nachos with reueben...haha...so long din eat aredi....anw...after the movie...walked around great world...den back to tiong....nothing much todae...watchin the nkf show again...well...they really have all the sad stories....really pitiful....sighs...my heart really goes out to ALL the nkf patients...ure in my prayers....ANW...before i end...a few things to sae....I ONLY USED 2 WELL todae...haha...improvement.....and well to end off, ill leave the next paragraph for everyone....

As i watched the movie today, this line came across which made lots of sense....it went like this:
" To make mistakes is HUMAN........but to FORGIVE....is divine...."
How many of us can actually say right now that you haf no enemies...and u bear no grudge with anione....well im sure every single one of u has 1 or 2 pple ure not happy with coz they made a mistake....or they haf hurt u in one way or another...well...think about it...y not right now....forgive them...coz its always gd to forgive...even Jesus Himself forgave those who hurt Him....why cant we? As for me...im glad to say that i have tried as hard to forgive those who hurt me in one way or another...and well though it may be difficult to bring yourself to do it....but after you do it...TRUST ME...u will feel gd...and also the Big Guy up there will be smiling at you....think about it......

" To make mistakes is HUMAN....but to FORGIVE.....is divine...."
- Huggie Bear aka Snoop Dog -

2004-04-17T22:59:00.000+08:00

todae was one of the most disturbing days for me i guess...well coz i pissed a close fren of mine off yest due to something...and well...felt so sad in the night and it was brought over till today....so felt like shit when i woke up in the morning...it went like this...it was a decision to make between 2 close friends....that stupid deliema....and i guess in the end...i made a damn bad and wrong decision that i really regretted....u see....1 group of friends was my guy friends and also the same time my drill team...it was their basking todae and i wanted to go down to show them my support and see how they did....well...another one was my really close friend who was alone in the airport sending off her parents who were going off for a while....well...i chose to go to see my guy friends....and really really regretted that damn decision...not because that i dun wan to see my guy friends...but well... i should have went to my close fren who needed someone more....well...she cried at the airport...without anione around her...which made me feel like crap...wad a dumb idiot i was.....sighs....wad was worse enuff was that she was alone with no one around her when she was sad....wad was even worse was that she was so angry, pissed with me...sigh...it really made me crumble...i had not ever felt like shit like this....wrong decision...well nothing much i can do now..cept to sae that im sorry i wasnt around...and it was a real bad decision i made...hope u do forgive me...coz i can sae to a certain extent i did not mean for this to happen.....well....sighs....hope everything goes on fine....anw...eventually i did meet her...but for a while...hopefully that cleared things up a little...but well i admit i was at fault...sorry sorry sorry...anw...went to orchard later to see my bb boys do their basking...well...it was such an impressive drill performance....one of the finest ive ever seen ever since my time...well...hopefully tts a gd start for 33rd....we will keep our flag flying high yeah...and well done cai!! uve done well....and to my drill team...u were simply stunning marvellous...if cna was there to film u guys...u were sure to be interviewed...haha...anw...dunno why but felt real sian the whole dae esp at night...no mood to really do anithing....perhaps its coz of wad happened the last 2 days....plus....life in camp is getting much much worser...boss is getting more and more demanding and unreasonable....sighs......hope things get better....gonna sign off.....

2004-04-16T23:13:00.000+08:00

nothing much today....started off conducting IPPT for my unit.....den after that i spent the rest of the day with my trainees...talking cock with them....telling them the life in my unit...esp in my training branch...after hearing...they were rather stunned and scared due to the immense task ahead of them....after that in the evening...after 4 mths, i finally get to play soccer again...played soccer with my friends in camp and started off real rusty...haha...but as the match progressed...i scored more and more...haha...was real fun...anw...really nothing much today...tmls the weekend....OUT OF CAMP SOON! phew.....hoping tml will be better!

2004-04-15T21:03:00.000+08:00

havent been blogging for quite a few days...coz i was on army exercise in the jungle doing my Built Up Area fighting...jus like those fighting u see in Black Hawk Down?? yups...aniwae...its been a past few days of happenings and ill jus sum up whatever i can remember...firstly was my driving test on Wed morning...well...it was the most anxious moment i had in the past few mths...the stress...well...anw...guess the tester din relli like me...penalised me in a lot of minor mistakes...and well..they all added up into alot...dun relli wanna tok about it...will try again in june....den in the afternoon went back to the jungle...where i was climbing a ladder in the building halfway....a hornet stung me...damn hornet...stung me on my finger...well....my finger had a burning sensation and i was evacuated to the nearest medical centre in an army camp....welll...basically i think ill write down wad happened in a story form coz it was rather funny...here it goes:
* i reported to the registration counter...where the medical clerk was sleeping on the table
me: AHEM!
* clerk still motionless
me: Excuse me..
* clerk wakes up looking super blur
me: i would like to see the doc
Clerk: for wad?
me: i just got stung by a hornet
* Clerk opened his eyes wide...shouted HORNET??!! and he ran into some room
* He den brings out a group of senior medic...where the most senior shouted
Snr Medic: WHERE IS THE GUY WITH HORNET STING??!! ( Looks gan chiong )
me: here i am
Snr Medic: WHERE IS THE HORNET????
me:huh? its still at my training area....
Snr Medic: NONONO..WHERE IS THE STING??
me: ohhhh its here...
Snr Medic: ARE U FEELING BREATHLESS? DIZZY? ARE U SWELLING??
me: nope im ok...
* he den heaves a sigh of relief...den i spent the next hour waiting for the doc who went out for lunch,....well at last he came back..i was attended to...and sent out to wait fro my medication...after waiting for very long, my name was called out. this guy at the dispensary...lets call him X
* i proceed to the dispensary counter
X: This is your medication, what did u see the doc for
me: i just got stung by a hornet
* he looked stunned and stared blankly at me....
X: erhh...i dunno why but well...these are flu tablets for u...follow the instruction stated on top...
-end-
haha...well it was real funny to see pples reaction...i guess i was lucky the hornet din inject its full sting on me...or i was able to react quite fast..either way i would like to thank God that it din went worser than it was....

aniwae...my exercise ended today...after which we went back to camp....i took a much long awaited bath....bathing never ever seemed that good.....haa..den went to sleep at 3pm...woke up around 6pm...den supposed to have dinner with my army mates but well they were still sleeping...and looking at them sleeping so nicely i guess dinner would be very late...so i jus went home first...well...met medeline for dinner today...haha...its been 3 yrs ever sincce i met up with her...haa...uve grown up alot...nice to be able to catch up with ya...had a rahter fun time chatting and catching up....haa..she was still as 'funny' ...haha....after which i sent her up back to her workplace...which was in westmall....den i came home....and on my comp....its been a long time i catched up with my frens...so well right now i am doing tt...

well well...todaes blog is reall long...its for 3 days...so just bear with me alright?? well...as i spend time toking to my friends...well...out of all my friends...i can say that 80-90% of them are facing with relationship problems? well...im staying by them...sharing with them how they should deal with their probs...offering my advice...well...sometimes i feel lonely giving people advices...being one old man i am...haha...im full of experience due to all my failed relationships...haa...but i guess i still am able to give sound advices...well my dear friends reading this blog...as i was sharing with one person today....here it goes in a relationship:

In a relationship, u cant expect everything to go ur way, u cant know wads gonna happen for sure...in fact there is no such thing as security in a relationship....in a relationship...there must be trust....and with trust will come hurt....so i can say that there is no such thing as a happy happy happy relationship...coz in a way or another...at times...the other might not meet the expectations and take trust for granted...and well all probs come in....thats all about relationship...if u love her or him...trust him or her....and if u cant trust ....dun commit....it will only do 2 parties damage...and most important of all...before u even wanna think of going into a relationship, ALWAYS seek God...for He knows whats best for u...always.....1) ask Him whether u are ready to go into a relationship 2) ask Him whether its the right time now and lastly 3) ask Him whether he/she is the right one for you...yups...well lastly, remember getting into a relationship is not about loving each other so much when ure out together and when ure happy togehter....but its about being able to commit....and to love....and to stick by each other...when things go wrong...and when sometimes the feelings are fading....yeah...my 2 cents worth...take care my dear friends...im praying for all of you...for you all mean a great deal to me...

2004-04-13T00:26:00.000+08:00

well, monday bluezz...thats how i will describe this day.... started the day off with crappy driving lesson...was totally off today coz it was soo early and i was barely awake... saw this crazy guy while i was driving...he was standing in the middle of the road stopping traffic!! just for fun...he wasnt directing traffic coz his car broke down or there was danger in front...he wAS CRAZY! anw...after driving i proceeded to camp....was doing my work quietly in my office when my RSM just came over....asked me a qn which i answered politely...and jus rattled off at me for no rhyme or reason...he WAS ALSO CRAZY! ... anw...this incik always had a problem with me...some favourtism thingy...and apparently he din like me...and he always aim me...well...lan lan...no choice...im just a NSF...so couldnt do much...sat there let him scold...when he was done,i turned around carrying on with my work....after that jus din feel good for the rest of the day...i just felt something was wrong...there was nothing to smile about...nothing to talk about...and just nothing to be happy about...well...crappy day really....driving test is coming...2 more days...and counting down... i still think i cant make it...sighs....will be real sad on wed when i fail the test..... anw....today something struck me...my fren in camp....asked me...joel wads wrong with u nowadays...u look so troubled...affected....u rarely smile...u rarely speak....are u alright......well thats wad he told me...and he was right...i had no idea why i was like this....as i think ...i guess there was many many things which are wrong which are causing this.... (1) I aint living a good christian life....God is perhaps missing from my priority list...all i wanted was fun fun fun....well...realised today it was time to let go...pray to God and ask for forgiveness....for He is the one who controls my life... i shouldnt think and plan so much on wad i wanna do....first thing i should do is to pray...pray hard on wad God wans me to do and wad is His focus for me....well will just do that after i blog... (2) well i guess i am appraoching yet another crossroads of my life again....from army to university...many many changes will happen and the future seems uncertain...worries are starting to accumulate in me...wad if i cant do well in university? wad if i cant cope? wad other activities i will do either than studyin in university? will i be able to actively serve in the bb? will i have time for my friends? how will be my new friends like? well well...so many things...so uncertainl....some people may say is hu si luan siang...or im thinking too much....maybe i am...but well...its affecting me (3) Friends around me are affected by relationship problems....there are quite a few...well and im really affected over this...because of the state my respective friends are...they are so sad...so dejected and jus so troubled...and i can feel it...and i feel it real hard...esp 2 of my close friends are facing it...so seeing them in this state even hurts me even more....i wanna help them but theres a limit on where i can help......and for one of my friends..she is overseas...even worse...how do i help her? when she needs someone... i can only be there for her online...thats as much as i can help...she is feeling bored n lonely over there...but how can i help when im stuck at another side of the world...sighs...sometimes i jus feel so helpless....all i can do for all these friends is pray hard to God that he might guide them and grant them peace....which surpasses all understandings....i really hope they will be fine soon... (4) My driving test this wed is affecting me real bad too...jus feel i wun make the mark...well well...we will see...(5) I need directions in my life...right now im feeling lost...a loss of wad to do and wad i should do....well...ill just live each day...hoping one day tt big guy above will enlighten me some way or another....well...sighs...hope tml will be a better day...gonna sign off here my dear friends...whoever is reading this... well... whether u noe it or not...u guys mean alot to me...friends....something which i cant do without..... ciaoz

2004-04-12T00:25:00.000+08:00

well well...today was quite an eventful day!started off with going for driving lesson at 7am today....went to circuit today!! 2nd time only....still not really comfortable inside....anw...something happened during driving todae....some stupid old man sabo me...he turned his van into a small road and suddenly turn out again....i couldnt stop in time so i had to siam him by making a sharp steer...sighs...almost met with an accident coz of ah pek...sabo king siah....anw...instructor told me not my fault...tt made me feel better....anw...after driving i went home and den proceeded to church...today JEREME WAS EARLY....haha...no wonder it rained in the afternoon...lol...reuben was as usual late...and ben low was the earliest...went for the 630 sunrise service...haha..he is good man....anw...after church we decided to have lunch at dover where dunno wad happened but the whole dover was smelling real bad...so in the end no choice we went to the coffeeshop less smelly where ben low met us for lunch there...the ban mian sucks...so dun ever take the ban mian from there...anw....halfway thru lunch...something very bizzare happened....the birdshit FELL ON CHAN HO'S head....lol...was so damn funny his reaction...everyone asked him to buy 4d...lol....chan ho...u must be feeling lucky...ahah...after that we proceeded to orchard and ran in the rain...den went to suntec for the sports warehouse sale which turned out to be nothign more than a dumping ground for old stocks...haha...disappointing.....was resting halfway when we saw the horse face walking past...haha...after that...we went bk to eat the new monterro burger or something...not very nice...after that....we walked and walked...and den proceeded back to our homes...upon reaching home, i went out again to my uncles house...he cooked for my mama's bday..which is today! happy bdae mummy! he cooked pepper crab!! and it was shiok!!! haha....anw...now im back in my room summarising my day...very tired now...but before i end of...i would like to pose everyone a qn my fren asked me....u gotta think over it carefully guys...

Here it goes:
Is it ever possible for a guy and a gurl be close friends only.....and stay this way without developing feelings for each other as time goes by? Or all close friendships betwn a guy and a gurl will always end up with the 2 being an item after a while...well...think bout it...think carefully...and think in deep....tts all today folks...till we meet again!

2004-04-11T21:56:00.000+08:00

this is blog for Sat one....well...basically nothing much....started the day with a run with the 10th mono FDC course....the other course im taking....im currently taking 2 different courses at the same time...so dealing with 2 different group of people...well...this is the FDC first wk and today was my first encounter with them...well...it was not bad and i had a great time with them....AND gosh...i found out that WEI CHANG was inside too...my sec sch bb junior...haha...so sad....coz pple coming into my unit will only suffer and suffer...feel sad for them....anw....nothing much todae....spent whole day in camp doing duty....doing my admin work...so not much happening...until the nite....had this mass conversation with my group of friends...glad to say that this group has once again moved to another level...the way we spoke and shared...i can feel the friendships strengthening.....anw...somebody is hurting my friend...and we aint relli happy about tt...but well....i guess ill just let him make his decisions.....wad i can do as a friend is just to stay by him...stand by him...and be around for him when he needs someone to talk to or he needs advice....hope im doing the right thing though.....i am really affected by wad is happening to him and very worried for him coz he hasnt been happy...but well...i guess thats just wad every guy has to go thru when it comes to relationships....i hope everything will get better though....tts all today...BORING

2004-04-10T00:34:00.000+08:00

today was a happening day! well...started of the day by my mum waking me up 1 hour earlier...she shook my bed in the morning...and said..." joel!! wake up! 9am already !" ...so i pulled myself out of bed...went to the toilet and washed my face....and went back to my room...only to realise my mum faked me...woke me up at 8am...zzz...was totally turned off...and when i told her my service was at 1015 no need wake up so ealry...she said...orhh ok lor...wahh....haha...aniwae...woke up so early so did my stuff slowly...at 9am...as usual did my morning calls to huihua, jereme, bobo, jia en and some others....none answered except hh...haha...anw....it was about 945 when hh told me that she was gonna be late...so being a nice friend...i thought to myself...since she told me right in the morning that she was so tired....somemore plus she was gonna be late...so i decided to offer her a ride to church...so i made my way to de bank near my house to draw some cash and made my way to her house to pick her up......anw....made my way to church with her...den after service...went with bobo, ben low, ziyi, georgie, weijie and jereme to qway to look for george socks and bobo's boots...den made our way to orchard cine...where cai joined us....we wanted to watch hellboy today coz many pple was underaged cannot watch passion.....anw...cine had no tix so we went to plaza sing and hogged the AXN machine as we cancelled transaction 3 times...haha the pple behind us were sure pissed coz they were like waiting so long to use the machine coz of us...haha sorry guys!!! anw, after we got our tix...we went to pastamania to have our lunch where some funny stuff happened, i had mushroom and ham pizza which was yummy and filling....after that, bobo and gang offered me their soup...and when i drank, it was like pouring a bottle of tabasco sauce into my mouth...haha...almost choked on it...crazy pple ... anw...after that we went to watch HELLBOY..haha it was a cooool show esp hb puling out his horns and his huge stuff...haha...hb sure had a huge appetite for pancakes and beacons...haha....anw...the show taught us that even though a person was born to be bad...he still had a choice whether to be good or to be bad....as for hellboy....he chose to be good...and welll like every other action hero shows...the bad pple get destroyed...but it was a cool show...anw.....after the show...we made our way to bobo's house to watch liverpool vs arsenal...haha...all of us wanted arsenal to lose and the match was rather exciting with liverpool leading first....we went into esctacy....esp when liverpool led 2-1...but once arsenal made a comeback, they led 4-2...we immediately switched off the television and played winning eleven on ps 2...haha...i played with bobo and jereme and won dem both 1-0 each...jereme had 1 player sent off while bobo had 4 players sent off....haha...lol...jus because they slide me....anwiae...had great fun....about 10pm, we all made our way back home...i flagged a cap and gave a lift to ben low, cai and jereme home...at first wanted them to pay but after tt thought to myself that i pay...so well...its a rather eventful day...sighs...one of my best buddy is real sad over his love stuff...hang in there dude...dun regret wadever decision u made tt time...dun blame urself...its not ur fault at all...anw...i hope time will heal ur wound and u would be happy again...i wish u all the best dude....and guys and gurls....food for thought today......

In life, how we want our lives to be depends on our deciisions
and to make decisions
we have to choose between choices....
well...before u make a choice, think carefully
and well after ur choice is made...stick with it and dun ever regret....
well...however our lifes will turn out is dependent on wad choices we will make....think bout it...
very tired now...gd nite folks!

2004-04-09T01:07:00.000+08:00

today has been rather eventful...started off as a slack day in camp....tortured my ASLC course today by giving them a tough chin up regime...3 sets of 12...plus 20 15 10 push ups...well...sure they were high over tt...but well...its for their own gd...anw...i jus did a brief stand by area for them....ha...and well...off we went...book out!!!! i was so excited to book out that i forgotten to tell them wad time to book in...haha....aniwae...all of them headed to chevrons while i headed on to my driving lessons again...haha...today driving wasnt as smooth coz it was 530 pm...traffic was crazy...had to speed so fast just to get into another lane so i can turn....stupid selfish drivers....think i L plate den look down on me...wait till i get my licence!!! haha...anw...i sped today...instructor scolded me for that...haha....anw, after driving, i walked to the chevrons to join my ASLC trainees for their function....was the only instructor there so felt abit akward....but got better once i spoke to them...well...my trainees are nice to chat with....hopefully after i leave the army, we can still meet up once in a while to catch up man....while i was at chevron, siqiang was so nice to call me and asked me if i wanted a lift to church since it was on the way, i gladly accepted his offer...we made our way to church...and went for the maundy thur service...ahahah... someone called it the monty thur service...cannot blame him...but hey we all learn yeah...so no offence@!!..haha...anw, it was a real solemn and meaningful service, for a moment while the choir was singing, combining the scenes i watched in passion....and the song of agony Jesus was in...i felt real sad, almost to the verge of tearing...coz i could really feel his pain, agony and desperation and loneliness....sighs...He did so much for us yet we always dissapoint Him...anw....after service, i had many plans to go out and stuff but none materialised...was rather sad and affected that my mood was totally gone....but rather not tok bout it...wad touched me was how jia en and huihua tried to make things better...sorry guys but i relli had no more mood...so din wanna join u guys...heard u guys had stingray...wasteD!...haha i din go...but well...thanks alot Huihua for understanding and also trying to cheer me up...really really appreciate it my friend....well...i think i also pissed one of my close friends off by maybe being too insensitive...i was jus trying to help...but i guess i wasnt sensitive enuff...sorry dude...pls forgive me...sighs...real sad...tts probably wads making me feeling worse....anw....another food for thought today....guys and gurls...its maundy thurs....spend some time to think about Jesus suffering on the cross...jus for us...its real sad.....sign off here...

2004-04-08T00:31:00.000+08:00

today has been a rather normal day, started the day doin nothing in the morning except celebrating the fact that ARSENAL AND REAL MADRID IS OUT....i wonder how Wenger is doing now...anw...in the afternoon, went to trainees bunk and checked its condition, was in a total shock when i saw the mess it was in...well, i had no choice but to punish them jia lat jia lat....dey had the worst punishment i ever given to any trainees....10 counts of prata....well, i did it coz i wanted them to learn, my heart kept telling me to stop them when they were carrying out the punishment...but i knew i had to do my job, and make dem learn, welli jus hope they understand that its just all for their own good....anw, after that i had a gym session with those trainees weak in their IPPT. taught them some stuff and then did gym myself too...its been such a long time i exercised! glad im able to make it down and sweat it out today...after gym, i made my way to driving again...once again todae my instructor told me that i can pass if i work hard....i relli hope i can pass my test....6 days to go.....counting down...well, had a few conversations today with my friends too...well 2 of my frens had some probs....sighs....all i can sae is that chuin, hang in there...i really hope things will get better for you...remember when u cant take it anymore, jus let go alrite...im real concerned for u...hope u will feel better knowing that someone else cares...
Anw, Sylvia!finally done your testimonial alrite? happy? haha....its real funny hearing about your fate with WOODS sweets...haha....take care gurl...
Well, to end of todays blog, dear friends, its important to forgive and forget people around you, just like Jesus set an example and forgive others, so should we....if he could forgive people who crucified Him and nailed Him to the cross, why cant we forgive people who caused intense hurt in our lives...recently, i just forgave 2 people whom hurt me alot in the past.....coz of wad Jesus did....that was the least i could do...well jus a food for thought guys and gurls...

2004-04-07T00:44:00.000+08:00

been a rather nice day today i suppose...firstly when office and did all my admin stuff....good that i got things done and well...hopiefully everything will just work out fine the way i planned it....anw..went for recce for FIBUA training today in the late morning...had this joyride in the 1.5 tonner where me and my colleagues had a nice butt massage while going thru the rocky terrain...it was truly a recce coz we went every corner we could....after that, i was told to lead the vehicle to some place...so i sat in front, as we were negotiating a sharp turn, the door swung open and my body got swung out...but due to my quick reaction, i immediately held on to the handle in front and also the door...and closing the door immediately...phew...wad a close shave...if not ill be in the hospital now already...anw, we went to FIBUA village and well...though its been almost a year ever since i trained over there, im still able to clear the windows with ease...ha...hopefully next week our training there will be a smooth one...anw, went back to the trainees in the afternoon, taught them how to improve on their physical fitness and taught them some gym workouts...their test is next week...hopefully they will do well!! guys dun disappoint me man...anw, after work, rushed to jp to meet haha...who else but my dear fren huihua...had dinner at the foodcourt where we had this thingy about chio meat...haha...damn funny...she told me she wanted that chicken i was eating coz it was more chio than the rest...haha...well...had a gd luff over it...den she aso bumped into many friends...making me wonder where were all my friends?? haha...anw, had a great day with her and girlgirl...haha...we actually contested who could spot her(girl girl not liam)...haha...poo on the grass...well i won! coz im full of shit! haha...dumb thing to do but well...im a dumbo...haa...after that i went for my driving lesson, well today was good....he actually for the first time told me...joel u can PASS! keep it up arhh...haha was so damn motivated by tt sentence...im gonna make sure he says that again tml during lesson...well...todaes been a funny day, chatting with sooo many friends and welll different people came to me with different problems and different requests...well am so glad to be a helping hand to them....i hope everything goes well for all of u guys...take care...meanwhile jus keep praying that my granny will be alright...gonna sign off here...ciaoz

2004-04-06T01:09:00.000+08:00

well, today was LIBERATION DAY...finally managed to walk out the gates of hell of my camp and smell the nice civilian air...its been so many days that i even forgotten how going home felt like...haa...aniwae...was supposed to meet reuben and jereme at 1230 but was about 45 mins late...no choice...oh ya..berfore i forget...today was also a new batch of RPs coming in to train under my branch...well...guess wad...as i was looking at the trainees... i SAW james! James was my fellow athlete in fmss last time...gosh was he unlucky to be posted to my unit...sighs...i wish him all the best....i only have 4 mths left...but as for him he still has almost 2 years...gosh...its gonna be tough...hang in there dude...aniwae...it also means i have to think twice when i punish my trainees...coz he is in there...ha...aniwae...me, reuben and jereme went macs to eat den walked around queensway to look for reubens soccer boots....in the end no size...so we proceeded to IKEA...haha...down there i saw lots of nice furniture esp this 238 dollars sofa bed...sit on it aredi dun wan to get up...anw...we went round looking at all the cool furnitures as i seeked inspiration on wad i can do to my room...as we passed each counter...i took the ikea pencils...haha...got loads of them now...after IKEA we parted and i went to my driving lesson..welll todae was find as i did 2 more test routes...relli hope i can keep my nerve next wed and pass my test...brr...anw...after my driving i went home...due to the inspiration generated in IKEA...i decided to reconfigure my whole room and TADA....now my room has lots of space due to my inspiration...im going to go IKEA to buy carpet, cushions to put on the floor so that my friends can CAMP over!!! den also gonna buy a trophy cupboard to store ALL my trophies...haha...well well....gonna furnish up my room before i get to University...everythin is jus so bright ahead...so exciting...hope it will be...
On the sad note, i recieved news today that my granny has been admitted to hospital due to low blood pressure...and she actually fainted...sighs...i really hope she will be fine....shes a real gd granny, an exemplery and caring one...always take cares of us very very welll...i really hope she will be fine....thanks to all my friends around me...all telling me that they will keep her in prayer...thanks guys and gurls...u guys are the people which keeps me going! alrite...eyes twitchin..no idea why..signing off here!

2004-04-05T00:48:00.000+08:00

todays been a boring day...its been almost a wk i haven been home...stuck in camp due to my ATP range and den followed by duty...i really miss the air outside camp. Well, at least to brighten things up, Our AQ team came in 7th and 8th position for the whole race. Which in my opinion was a very great acheivement for we have never ever achieved such great results. And it was out of 70 teams! Well done guys, im truly proud of u guys...well...right now kinda missing all my frens, bobo, ben low, ziyi, jereme, jia en, chan ho...de whole gang...hopefully can meet upw ith u guys soon...and crap and do crazy things again...
Somehow its a nostalgic day for me yest too...3 Apr...my 2 yrs anniversary in the army...haha...gonna leave the SAF soon...and enjoy life to the max again...kinda feeling sad im gonna leave my camp, camp mates...coz they are great...real great..will miss everyone..will leave my office...will miss my table, my comp, miss the jungle, the missions, the tekan days...haha...its jus all comin back to me now...gonna start a new chap soon...exciting but yet worrying..well well...hopefully i can get a half day tml so can meet bobo for lunch....will see....

2004-04-04T16:16:00.000+08:00

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